The Gift of Giving 

The gift of giving changes after the passing of your loved one. When you are in a loving partner relationship you tend spoil each other. This is missing once you lose your partner. The flowers, the chocolates and cakes, and gifts of kindness are no more. There is a hole in your life.

Other people may do special acts of kindness, but it never fills that particular place in your heart. I missed giving and receiving these treats with my husband. He was my world and I loved doing special things for him.

The best way to remedy it by treating yourself and others. Although it never is the same, this simple act of generosity fills an empty day. Buy flowers for yourself, boxes of chocolates, or anything you fancy. Also buy gifts and treats for others.

There are countless losses and all you can do is to try and provide close to what you had. Loving yourself enough to spoil yourself is healing and teaches you to be self-sufficient. Spoiling others enables you to retain your kindness and to continue to be thoughtful.

When my husband died, I missed this aspect of my life. I had found much joy in giving to him and now I was limited. Instead, I sent him love and light whenever I could. I sent good wishes and hopes that he finds happiness too. It was a spiritual act, rather than a physical human one, however it fulfilled my need to give to him. I remembered him in my prayers and often lit a candle on his behalf.

The act of giving continues, even though they are gone from our physical reality.